Should I Go For It? Dating Someone with CF (Part 1)
Last updated: June 2021
Wow! That girl is hot! She is also super cool. She dances, sings, does comedy, she likes a lot of the things that I like...wait, what is this CF thing she has been talking about? These were some of the things going through my head 8 years ago when I first met Cheriz, my (now) spouse of almost 6 years!
Meeting my wife, Cheriz
We met 8 years ago when we both were in our community college's show choir. Seeing her dancing in the line in front of me; I was instantly attracted to her. She seemed like she was so full of life! After I had smoothly danced my way into her view (my Shakira hips were what made her fall in love with me!), I had learned that she had something called cystic fibrosis.
She mentioned that she blogged about her experience with CF. I will be honest, I didn't have a clue what CF was. But I really liked her and I wanted to learn more about her.
First learning about cystic fibrosis
So I went home and looked up her blog. I read her very first article she had ever written. One blog post led to another, and before I knew it, I had read every blog entry she had written. Now I know what your thinking: "Andrew, isn't this is a little stalkerish?" Yes a little, but she was so cool, and as I read her blog I started to fall in love with her.
I heard stories of her resilience and how she has overcome adversity. Her personality shined through, which was also something that immediately drew me into her. We started talking, and shortly after we started dating.
Right from the start, I started my education into dating someone with CF. I had noticed that she had to take pills with everything she ate. She would go home early because she had to do her therapies. At times her voice was a little raspy, and that after moving around a lot she would get winded. I quickly started to find out the reasons behind all of these things, and I also started to figure out different ways to support her as we dated.
My love grew stronger and stronger for Cheriz
The reason she took so many pills when she ate, was to help with her digestive system. She had to double the number of calories a "normal" person should consume. So she would eat a lot during the day. I graduated from culinary school. So I worked with her in trying to find different ways to increase the number of calories she took in. Increasing the amount of fat in the things I cooked (BUTTER!), making smoothies with whole milk/yogurt, and getting her more snacks when out and about.
I found out she would go home early because she had hours of meds to do before she was able to hook up to her feeding machine (yes, that was an interesting shock when I found out!) and go to bed. To counter this, we wouldn't hang out with other friends as long as we may have liked.
We would also hang out a lot at her house, which made things very convenient. If we did happen to stay out later, I would sit up with her as she did her meds. This strengthened our relationship, and it showed that I was going to walk this path with her.
Benefits of dating someone with CF
It is the small acts that produce the most beneficial contributions in dating someone with CF. It does not take some large extravagant act. Instead, you need to try and find ways to be with one another and find ways to support them in their routines.
Dating someone with CF never complicated things. It has shown me how precious life is and how to make the most of our situation. Finally dating someone with CF was the best decision I have made because CFers have a different outlook on life - which is refreshing!
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